Do you REALLY want to be in a relationship?


“It is an absolute human certainty that no one can know his own beauty or perceive a sense of his own worth until it has been reflected back to him in the mirror of another loving, caring human being.”
John Joseph Powell, The Secret of Staying in Love

“I was suffering the easily foreseeable consequences. Addiction is the hallmark of every infatuation-based love story. It all begins when the object of your adoration bestows upon you a heady, hallucinogenic dose of something you never dared to admit you wanted-an emotional speedball, perhaps, of thunderous love and roiling excitement. Soon you start craving that intense attention, with a hungry obsession of any junkie. When the drug is witheld, you promptly turn sick, crazy, and depleted (not to mention resentful of the dealer who encouraged this addiction in the first place but now refuses to pony up the good stuff anymore– despite the fact that you know he has it hidden somewhere, goddamn it, because he used to give it to you for free). Next stage finds you skinny and shaking in a corner, certain only that you would sell your soul or rob your neighbors just to have ‘that thing’ even one more time. Meanwhile, the object of your adoration has now become repulsed by you. He looks at you like you’re someone he’s never met before, much less someone he once loved with high passion. The irony is,you can hardly blame him. I mean, check yourself out. You’re a pathetic mess,unrecognizable even to your own eyes. So that’s it. You have now reached infatuation’s final destination– the complete and merciless devaluation of self.” – pg 20-21”
Elizabeth Gilbert Sputnik Sweetheart

“Of course it hurt that we could never love each other in a physical way. We would have been far more happy if we had. But that was like the tides, the change of seasons–something immutable, an immovable destiny we could never alter. No matter how cleverly we might shelter it, our delicate friendship wasn’t going to last forever. We were bound to reach a dead end. That was painfully clear.”
Haruki Murakami, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz

“I think you are wrong to want a heart. It makes most people unhappy. If you only knew it, you are in luck not to have a heart.”
L. Frank Baum, The Wise Man’s Fear

“nothing in this world was more difficult than love.”
Gabriel García Márquez The Goddess Test

“Books are a poor substitute for female companionship, but they are easier to find.”
Patrick Rothfuss, I Like You: Hospitality Under the Influence

“I care,” he said in a trembling voice. “I care so much that I do not know how to tell you without it seeming inconsequential compared to how I feel. Even if I am distant at times and seem as if I do not want to be with you, it is only because this scares me, too.”
Aimee Carter, The Indigo Spell

“Don’t leave a piece of jewelry at his house so you can go back and get it later; he may be with his real girlfriend.”
Amy Sedaris, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man: What Men Really Think About Love, Relationships, Intimacy, and Commitment

“Because I can’t help doing it,” he said with a shrug. “And hey, if I keep loving you, maybe you’ll eventually crack and love me too. Hell, I’m pretty sure you’re already half in love with me.”
Richelle Mead, Rules of Attraction

“All I’m telling you to do is to be smart about it. Know that if this man isn’t looking for a serious relationship, you’re not going to change his mind just because you two are going on dates and being intimate. You could be the most perfect woman on the Lord’s green earth-you’re capable of interesting conversation, you cook a mean breakfast, you hand out backrubs like sandwiches, you’re independent (which means, to him, that you’re not going to be in his pockets)-but if he’s not ready for a serious relationship, he going to treat you like sports fish.”
Steve Harvey, Emma

“Every woman that finally figured out her worth, has picked up her suitcases of pride and boarded a flight to freedom, which landed in the valley of change.”
Shannon L. Alder Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience

“We kiss all the time.” I clear my throat, then add, “We just…do it in private.”
Simone Elkeles, I Wrote This For You

“Seldom, very seldom, does complete truth belong to any human disclosure; seldom can it happen that something is not a little disguised or a little mistaken.”
Jane Austen, Max

“I find the best way to love someone is not to change them, but instead, help them reveal the greatest version of themselves.”
Steve Maraboli, The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass

“You’re just another story I can’t tell anymore.”
pleasefindthis, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

“He could totally be your boyfriend,” [Angel] went on with annoying persistance. “You guys could get married. I could be like a junior bridesmaid. Total could be your flower dog.”
James Patterson, Breaking Bread: Insurgent Black Intellectual Life

“Moving on is easy. It’s staying moved on that’s trickier.”
Katerina Stoykova Klemer The English Patient

“Sometimes it takes a heartbreak to shake us awake & help us see we are worth so much more than we’re settling for.”
Mandy Hale, Letters to a Young Poet

“A fit, healthy body—that is the best fashion statement”
Jess C Scott Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage

“How would your life be different if…You walked away from gossip and verbal defamation? Let today be the day…You speak only the good you know of other people and encourage others to do the same.”
Steve Maraboli, Wicked Lovely

“There comes a time in your life when you have to choose to turn the page, write another book or simply close it.”
Shannon L. Alder All About Love: New Visions

“We have to recognise that there cannot be relationships unless there is commitment, unless there is loyalty, unless there is love, patience, persistence.”
Cornel West, Warbreaker

“We die containing a richness of lovers and tribes, tastes we have swallowed, bodies we have plunged into and swum up as if rivers of wisdom, characters we have climbed into as if trees, fears we have hidden in as if caves.
Michael Ondaatje, How to Win Friends and Influence People

“only someone who is ready for everything, who doesn’t exclude any experience, even the most incomprehensible, will live the relationship with another person as something alive and will himself sound the depths of his own being.”
Rainer Maria Rilke, Seven Words of Jesus and Mary: Lessons from Cana and Calvary

“Start the Quiz”

  • Question of

    To you, relationships are…

    • A good way to find someone to be close with
    • A stress reliever from our hectic lives
    • The most important things in life
    • Casual fun, nothing too serious
  • Question of

    The best relationships will have…

    • Complete faith in the future
    • Fun
    • A strong friendship between the two
    • Trust in each other
  • Question of

    When you think about this new person of interest, what are you thinking?

    • They’re very relaxing to be around
    • They COULD be the best thing that’ll ever happen to me
    • I really wish they would ask me out already
    • They are pretty fun to be around
  • Question of

    If this person were to ask you out TOMORROW, what would you say?

    • Yes, things have been going well so far
    • No, I don’t feel like getting into a relationship
    • Yes, I thought you’d never ask!
    • I REALLY don’t know yet
  • Question of

    When you think about the flaws of this person of interest, what do you think?

    • I could learn to see past them
    • What flaws?
    • I guess we all have flaws, it would depend on how bad they are
    • Ew I don’t know if I could deal with that
  • Question of

    When you think about dating this person, how do you feel?

    • Kind of sad, it’ll mean being tied down to one person again
    • I’m not sure, we have on and off moments
    • Happy, I feel good around them
    • Really happy, we could finally spend all our time together
  • Question of

    What do you really think about dating?

    • If you really like someone, it could be fun, but if not, it’s becomes a chore
    • You get have fun with someone you enjoy being around
    • It’s a way to spend as much time possible to be with the one you love
    • Dating is mostly for titles, to show people that you’re taken
  • Question of

    How comfortable are you being yourself?

    • 80-100%
    • 60-80%
    • 40-60%
    • Less than 40%
  • Question of

    On a scale of 1-10, how confident are you?

    • Less than 4
    • 4-6
    • 6-8
    • 8-10
  • Question of

    How often do you let people walk over you?

    • Never.
    • Rarely.
    • Sometimes.
    • Pretty often.
  • Question of

    How high are your standards?

    • What standards?
    • Reasonable.
    • Pretty high.
    • To the sky.
  • Question of

    What do you value most in a partner?

    • Loyalty.
    • Honesty.
    • Money.
    • Their looks.
  • Question of

    What would you do if a friend asked you to do something that you really didn’t want to do?

    • Apologize right away and not do it.
    • Think hard and don’t do it.
    • Give it some thought and still do it.
    • I’d do it anyway.
  • Question of

    How long do you wait until you’re intimate with someone you just started dating?

    • A few days.
    • About a week.
    • About a month.
    • A few months.
  • Question of

    How often do you put yourself out there?

    • Rarely.
    • All the time.
    • Never.
    • Sometimes.
  • Question of

    What would you do it you just started dating and it’s really exciting and suddenly your partner wants to move with you?

    • Of course yes, we are already dating so it means we know each other very well.
    • I would ask him/her to wait for a few months, so we could get to know more about each others lifestyles.
    • No, I don’t think so, I am a free person, moving with someone makes you feel bounded to rules.
    • I would rather move with my friends than my partner.
  • Question of

    What if there is your favorite baseball game tonight that you were too excited for but your best friend calls about some sudden urgency with her/his partner, well they could call anyone but only called you. What will you do now?

    • I won’t cancel my night plan, best friend should call some other friend.
    • Com’on not today! But what can be done, I will have to go to my friend.
    • I will definitely go to my best friend, not even a single thought of the game would stop me.
    • I am not sure, I guess I will ask them if it’s a big urgency or not.
  • Question of

    You just got out of a relationship, but you already found someone that catches your eye. What do you do?

    • I wouldn’t talk to that person; I’m still broken-hearted
    • Casually talk to them, if it’s meant to be it will happen
    • I’m not sure whether I even like him or not right now
    • Flirt with them, I’m ready to move on to better things!
  • Question of

    You and this person of interest are casually flirting but nothing real yet. Another person asks you to go on a date with them, what do you do?

    • Say yes because there isn’t anything else to do
    • Say no because it wouldn’t feel right
    • Say yes because it’s not like we’re serious yet!
    • Say yes because who knows, things may be better with this one
  • Question of

    To you, the best part of a relationship is…

    • The long-term commitment
    • I don’t know
    • A little bit of everything
    • The playfulness

Am I ready for my first boyfriend?