What are your strengths as a romantic partner?

 

“When someone loves you, the way they talk about you is different. You feel safe and comfortable.”
Jess C. Scott,

“I no longer believed in the idea of soul mates, or love at first sight. But I was beginning to believe that a very few times in your life, if you were lucky, you might meet someone who was exactly right for you. Not because he was perfect, or because you were, but because your combined flaws were arranged in a way that allowed two separate beings to hinge together.”
Lisa Kleypas,

“Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike.”
J.K. Rowling,

“I think you still love me, but we can’t escape the fact that I’m not enough for you. I knew this was going to happen. So I’m not blaming you for falling in love with another woman. I’m not angry, either. I should be, but I’m not. I just feel pain. A lot of pain. I thought I could imagine how much this would hurt, but I was wrong.”
Haruki Murakami,

“The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.”
Carl Gustav Jung

“A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other…Maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever”
Dave Matthews Band

“You can talk with someone for years, everyday, and still, it won’t mean as much as what you can have when you sit in front of someone, not saying a word, yet you feel that person with your heart, you feel like you have known the person for forever…. connections are made with the heart, not the tongue.”
C. JoyBell C.

“For the two of us, home isn’t a place. It is a person. And we are finally home.”
Stephanie Perkins,

“Man may have discovered fire, but women discovered how to play with it.”
Candace Bushnell,

“It hurts to let go. Sometimes it seems the harder you try to hold on to something or someone the more it wants to get away. You feel like some kind of criminal for having felt, for having wanted. For having wanted to be wanted. It confuses you, because you think that your feelings were wrong and it makes you feel so small because it’s so hard to keep it inside when you let it out and it doesn’t coma back. You’re left so alone that you can’t explain. Damn, there’s nothing like that, is there? I’ve been there and you have too. You’re nodding your head.”
Henry Rollins,

“We’re all seeking that special person who is right for us. But if you’ve been through enough relationships, you begin to suspect there’s no right person, just different flavors of wrong. Why is this? Because you yourself are wrong in some way, and you seek out partners who are wrong in some complementary way. But it takes a lot of living to grow fully into your own wrongness. And it isn’t until you finally run up against your deepest demons, your unsolvable problems—the ones that make you truly who you are—that we’re ready to find a lifelong mate. Only then do you finally know what you’re looking for. You’re looking for the wrong person. But not just any wrong person: it’s got to be the right wrong person—someone you lovingly gaze upon and think, “This is the problem I want to have.”
Andrew Boyd,

“Well, it seems to me that the best relationships – the ones that last – are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is… suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with.”
Gillian Anderson

“The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.”
Ernest Hemingway,

“I mean, if the relationship can’t survive the long term, why on earth would it be worth my time and energy for the short term?”
Nicholas Sparks,

“Why is it,” he said, one time, at the subway entrance, “I feel I’ve known you so many years?”
Ray Bradbury,

“When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.”
Donald Miller,

“Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can’t figure out what from.”
Mae West

“There is greatness in doing something you hate for the sake of someone you love.”
Shmuley Boteach

“Start the Quiz”

  • Question of

    If your partner applied for a job they really wanted and did not get it, how would you make them feel better?

    • Cuddle them.
    • Take them out somewhere so you can spend time together to cheer them up.
    • Get them a thoughtful gift.
    • Help them put together a portfolio for a future interview.
    • Reassure them that they are determined and can do anything they put their mind to. Remind them that you love them and that they can always get a similar job somewhere else. Remind them of their positive traits.
  • Question of

    What would be the most hurtful thing your partner could do to you?

    • Being physically distant from me when we are together.
    • Not making enough time for me.
    • Refusing to do little things that would really help me out and make my life less stressful. (always leaving a mess for me to clean up, using my car and leaving the gas tank on empty, etc.)
    • Not buying or making me something for my birthday or our anniversary.
    • Belittle me and talk down to me.
  • Question of

    What do you think is the best way to tell if someone is really into you?

    • They make time to be with you even when they have a very busy schedule.
    • They love hugging and kissing you. The sex is passionate.
    • They verbalize that they are supportive of your goals and lend a listening ear whenever you feel stuck. They are emotionally supportive and express that they believe in you.
    • They give you a homemade gift that they obviously spent some time on.
    • They do little things for you such as making your lunch for the next day so you can grab it on the way out the door or they draw a bath for you to de-stress at the end of the day.
  • Question of

    Out of these, which date idea sounds the most appealing to you?

    • Going into a dollar store with $10 each and buying each other exactly 10 items you think the other will like. Exchange gifts at the end.
    • Hiding cute messages around the house for the other person to find. A bit like a scavenger hunt. The messages can be, for example, reasons why you love that they are your partner.
    • I am not picky about what we do as long as I can do things to make the date special such as paying for the meal, helping them decide where to go after, etc.
    • Cuddling at home while watching movies.
    • Cooking a homemade breakfast together on a Saturday and then sitting down to enjoy it while enjoying each other’s company.
  • Question of

    If your partner accidentally hurt your feelings and felt horrible for it, what would make you feel better?

    • If they just stayed with me until I felt better.
    • If they bought me flowers.
    • If they just hold me or kiss me.
    • If they did little things and went out of their way to make it up to me.
    • If they left a little note or letter apologizing and showing they care.
  • Question of

    Little things! We all notice the little things our partners do. Which ‘little thing’ do you catch yourself doing for your partner the most?

    • I go out of my way to help them with things they’re struggling with. For example, I will make them a meal or I’ll help them prepare for a job interview. I’ll do their dishes if they seem overwhelmed.
    • I will often bring my partner a gift…even if it’s something small like their favorite candy bar or a flower.
    • I text or call them just to let them know I’m thinking about them.
    • I am always planning dates and talking to them about different date ideas. I want to do as much as we can together.
    • Putting my arm around them while on a date or going out of my way to hold their hand.
  • Question of

    Pick the one that sounds the most appealing to you in general.

    • A spa day.
    • Going to a birthday party.
    • Going to a museum.
    • Eating a delicious, homemade dinner.
    • Working out.
  • Question of

    Which of the following traits is the most attractive?

    • Dedicated
    • Generous
    • Compassionate
    • Affectionate
    • Selfless
  • Question of

    Pick another attractive trait.

    • Putting in effort
    • Friendly
    • Helpful
    • Supportive
    • Thoughtful
  • Question of

    Which trait is the LEAST appealing to you?

    • Selfishness
    • Discouraging
    • Thoughtless
    • Cold
    • Apathetic
  • Question of

    What is your main goal when listening to a partner who is stressed?

    • Holding them while they are talking about their problems.
    • Having empathy. Expressing that I understand where they are coming from. I want them to know that they do not need to feel alone and that I’m there for them. Being a good emotional support.
    • Giving them a useful or thoughtful gift that could make them feel better.
    • Giving them my undivided attention.
    • Trying to eliminate the sources of my partner’s stress.
  • Question of

    What would really bother you about a partner?

    • If they consistently forget to do the things they say they’re going to, and they often forget to do the bare minimum.
    • If they couldn’t stop watching the TV on the wall during a restaurant date instead of talking to me.
    • If they forgot to kiss or hug me hello after not seeing them for a while.
    • If they are overly critical when it’s not necessary.
    • If they gave me a gift that was clearly a last-minute purchase and something they didn’t put any thought into.
  • Question of

    You are out on a dinner date with someone new. What is one thing this person could do that would make you think about not going on a second date with them?

    • Doing inconsiderate things like showing up late to the date for no reason or not holding the door for you or others.
    • Not hugging you goodnight. Being generally standoffish.
    • Being rude to the server.
    • Texting on their phone for a lot of the time.
    • Giving you a gift that seemed to be done out of obligation or because they are expecting more dates out of you.
  • Question of

    It is your anniversary! Pick your favorite anniversary gift out of these.

    • A heartfelt love letter inside of an anniversary card
    • Taking me out to dinner to celebrate
    • A homemade scrapbook of photos of you and your significant other together
    • A homemade coupon for a free hour-long back massage from my significant other
    • A gift card to my favorite store
  • Question of

    Pick the most appealing one.

    • Kissing. holding hands. sex.
    • Lying next to each other in bed and talking about your dreams and goals.
    • Exchanging thoughtful presents with your significant other on a holiday after everyone else has gone home.
    • Simply being in the room together. enjoying each other’s company.
    • Picking up dinner for each other from your favorite restaurants without realizing the other was doing the same thing.
  • Question of

    Pick one.

    • Clock.
    • Garden.
    • Hand.
    • Flower.
    • Poetry.
  • Question of

    Pick another.

    • Token.
    • Touch.
    • Service.
    • Effort.
    • Words.
  • Question of

    Pick the one that describes you the LEAST.

    • Not making things for your partner.
    • Forgetting to do what I said I was going to do.
    • Speaking without thinking.
    • Forgetting to schedule time to see someone important to me.
    • Liking my personal space and not wanting anyone to infringe on it.
  • Question of

    How do you want your partner to feel about you?

    • That I am affectionate.
    • That they are worth my time.
    • That I am sentimental.
    • That I believe in them.
    • That I am willing to do whatever I can to make their life easier.
  • Question of

    You just went to a concert with your partner. What will be the most memorable aspect of it?

    • That my partner bought me a drink and food without me having to say I was hungry or thirsty. They just sort of already knew.
    • Having the ticket stub in my room so I can remember what a great time I had with them.
    • The car ride there and back! It’s always fun to listen to the music on the way there and talk together on the way back.
    • Holding each other in the crowd and kissing during the last song
    • That my partner took a personal day from work to go with me

Am I Aromantic?

What type of romantic are you?